We have just returned from a most nightmarish experience in Maryland with broken hearts. The baby we have been waiting for and into whom we have invested so much emotional energy and so many financial resources is not ours after all. After days of rocking, caring for, and loving her we feel a huge loss. One of the hardest parts (as it is with most trials) is shifting what we'd imagined would be. We worry about her future and wonder about what quality of life she may now have, because instead of spending eternity with her as our daughter and Mia's sister, her birth mother chose to parent and we got to make our way home with an empty car seat.
The morning that the non-adoption decision was made, I went outside to "run" the frustration out. Feeling so disheartened I just wandered around aimlessly until Ispotted this barefoot baby and her handsome dad coming to rescue me:
...and she made it okay.